The bike thief who almost didn't get away
From my cycling buddy who happens to be an Air Marshall and ex marine:
Yesterday the scenario that anyone who has ever had a bike stolen wishes they could have. I was going to work and walked my bike from my apartment downtown to the parking garage where I keep my jeep for a noon ride after work. Once I got to my car I realized i forgot something in my apartment and locked the bike in the back and walked back to the apartment with my bag. When I returned to my jeep I noticed that the back rear vent window in my jeep had been broken out but the bike and contents of the vehicle were untouched. Puzzled I walked towards the stairs to go back to the main office and report the broken window. As I approached the stairs I noticed the smell of marijuana and saw a shady looking guy acting like he was going to get in his truck. I walked down the stairs bypassed the office and ran back up the ramp to the parking garage suspecting the subject would return. As I got to the top of the ramp I see the subject taking the bike out of the back of my jeep and riding towards me. As the guy approaches I drop my bag and sprint into him tackling him with a full head of steam as he is approaching me at 10-12mph. The hit was bone crushing as I came down on him with 200lbs of force bouncing his head off the pavement in the process. Immediately I go into police restraint mode as a few bystanders witnessed my awesome tackle. I put the guy in a rear naked choke as he is struggling to get to his feet. I clench down with all my might feeling that I am crushing this guys windpipe and taking his life into my hands. As I am choking the guy to death I have a moment of clarity noticing that the bystanders are video taping me with their cell phones. I yell at them to get the police and they act as if I am speaking a foreign language. I let up on my choke before killing the guy and he starts to get up. I grab him by the back of the head and smack his head off the pavement a few times and throw in a few head butts of my own. I am continuing to tell these people to call the police as cars are lining up watching the fight waiting to drive by us and get out of the parking garage. The guy plays dead so I let up my grip and go for my bag to get my handcuffs. I get 5 steps away from the guy and he is getting up and going for the exit. I leave the bag and take off after him at full sprint. I catch him right as he gets to the door and slam him against the door making sure his head was the first thing to connect. We bounce back into the middle of the garage before I get him back in a choke. This time I don't have the choke deep and he starts trying to bite my arm. I see that blood is streaming down his head and realize that this guy might have aids and I could be cut from all the abuse I just dosed out on him. I release my grip and kick him as he staggers out of the emergency exit. 10 minutes later the cops show up and take a report. All of the bystanders disappeared as soon as the guy left and didn't lift a finger to help me. If I had been carrying my cuffs I could have arrested this guy but I am sure I will see him again hanging out near the civic center. I recovered my bike and bag and was left with a $300.00 bill for window repair. I wished I could have seen justice served.